Tuesday, February 18, 2014

For The Last Time

Let go,
Hurtful behavior,words
They are there,
They may chip away at you,
But you are better than believing that crap thrown at you,
Letting it tear you down
Breaking you,

I refuse to let you do that to yourself,
You may not be perfect,
You've been called names,
Told a million times of whats wrong with you,
How you ought to be,
You are human,
You are allowed to be imperfect,
But know this.......
You are beautiful,
soul and spirit,
Just remember that......

Dust yourself off
Tell yourself
I am here..
I am who I am
I am a good person,
You want to kick me
Maybe you did,
But I rise up.

You lost me,
You are never going to win....
I choose ME
In the name of God and everything that is holy,
I choose love and I choose ME
You can kiss me GOODBYE
I am done,
I am done,
I am done,

Kuala Lumpur
February 19 2014

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Breaking Down

Broke down,
Its not about you..
But somehow that ego of yours,
Made it about you...
Manage to criticize and chip away at my being,
That I don't believe , dress and do things to way you do,
What a bad person I am,

You wonder why I can't talk to you....
I don't feel safe,
Your love...
The one that you claim to have...
They feel conditional,
Your love is conditional,

When I look at you,
Most of the time I think,
I do not want to be like you,
Not this version of you,

I was never good enough then,
I am still less then to you now,

If I am mad....
Hell I am......This shit is done...
Whats stopping me?
I don't even know where to start.
Even if I did....
My soul would stop me...

Damn conscience!!!!
God and faith stopped me..
And still.... I am the bad one....
You can't even remember what I said or did five minutes ago....

If you only knew
the raw words I wish I could say to you,
You don't even really want to hear and see me,

Kuala Lumpur
February 17, 2014

Thursday, February 6, 2014

My Unconditional

Thinking of you,
Always thinking of you
Couldn't be bothered ..
Bothered to tell my heart...
Bothered to tell my mind..
Shut it off!!
Not even going to....
Never made sense... probably never will
But that's OK
I have surrendered to that.

Don't take me for naive,
Don't take me for stupid,
Don't take be for silly,
I know imperfections.....
but,,, in those imperfections
you were always my unconditional,
Always my guiding light,
making me ,
telling me,
wanting me,
Seek and be that better version of you,
as YOU yourself seek that better version of you

There will always be darkness,
You are that light,
You are that rock,
In your arms,
I feel love,
In that heart that millions seek,
In that heart that millions cares,
I am that corner space,
Where I still feel the safest,
I feel my wings,
I feel my joy,
Where I do feel my peace,
I just do.

In the seen or the unseen imperfections,
You are my unconditional,
Eternally will be.

Kuala Lumpur
February 6,2014